cursed

In and around the seventh grade, break up letters were all the rage. I remember breaking up with some poor dude in an e-mail around that age. What a jerk. So, I wrote a break up letter to myself:

Dear Caitlin,

I'm terribly sorry I had to do this through a letter, this felt better than talking to you in person because I am a wuss like that.. This note will be the last memory you'll ever have of me, I'm bouncing and not lookin back. Don't let it get you all upset inside, I always liked your friend more. It is because of your history of lying problems that keep me from being even remotely interested in continuing this relationship with you.

You'd be much better off finding a person that can deal with wonderful way you Never shaved your arm pits. I might miss certain things about you such as the time you flirted with my father at our family christmas dinner.

I'm glad this is done and we're going separate directions for good. I think you'll find someone to cheat on you daily, and write a letter through text messages. And hopefully we will be incredibly far away.

Love,
Caitlin

You can too. www.dearjohn.com